“The single biggest problem in communication is the illusion that it has taken place.”
George Bernard Shaw
Annmarie’s take on this:
Sometimes we forget that communication is a two-way street. It includes:
sender->message->receiver…who then responds:
receiver->message->sender
Unless you have both ends, you don’t have communication. You aren’t connecting. In our techno-world, it’s like sending an email and not hearing from the person you sent it to. You don’t know if they are too busy to respond, are ignoring you or if your email got lost in cyberspace.
When you are talking with someone, in person or not, the way you know they got your message is through their response. If someone is consistently not responding, it’s because of two things: they don’t want to talk to you or you aren’t delivering the message so they can hear you. In my workshop “How to Talk So People Will Listen” I advise women to notice if the listener is a story person or a bullet point person. If you are telling a story to a bullet point person, or vice verse, they won’t be able to get the message. For example, my spouse is a bullet point person. If I tell him a story that doesn’t have enough bullet points, he drifts off into what we call “the cocktail stare” – you know that look when someone is looking around for someone else with whom they can talk.
This week pay attention to how people are receiving your message and try delivering it a different way – notice if you are making better connections. Let me know how you do.
Comments