You know what to do and you focus on doing it. You've figured out what knowledge or skills you need and take action. The rub is that, like anything new, you have to take it one-step-at-a-time and focus. You develop a new competence but only when you are paying attention. For example:
- In life:You sign up for a class that enables you to tickle your interests or express your passions, like dance or art classes. You do great in class but when you get home, it's another story. You have to count every beat of music or think about every stroke of the brush.In Nancy Hill's case, she immersed herself and her sons into her church's activities. She took classes there and volunteered to help in different church departments. Even just getting involved wasn't easy at first for Nancy - but that's typical in the conscious competence stage
- In relationships: You know that having better boundaries will make a huge difference in the way you interact with others. So you've read books or gotten a piece of therapy through which you worked out several ways that you can say "no" to requests. It's hard not to say yes to everything - the way you always have in the past
- At work: You joined Toastmasters so you can get better at presenting at meetings and also at handling feedback. It's working, but it's more work than you ever thought it could be
Your new competence can be broken down into doable steps or stages, but you're still getting used to it. You're developing a new competency but it requires conscious concentration every step of the way.
For most of us, developing conscious competence is the place of victory. That's when you're stretching out of your comfort zone and into the greater, fuller expression of who you are. It's happening, but usually not as fast as you want it and, frankly, it ain't easy!
But that's what victory is all about, isn't it?!
More Articles from this month's Victory Theme
- Who Could Get Hurt?
Incompetence could have gotten me, my spouse or someone else killed.
Here's what happened...
- Competence - Stage 1 - Are You Ready for Success?
- Success and Competence: Stage 2 - Conscious Incompetence
- Success and Competence: Stage 3 - Conscious Competence
What is the Victorious Woman Project?
Founded by Annmarie Kelly, the Victorious Woman Project is a female empowerment resource containing articles, classes, books, podcasts and other tools for women over 40.