Last weekend, Jovan Belcher, the US NFL linebacker who played for the Kansas City Chiefs football team, murdered the mother of his infant child. Then he killed himself in front of his team's general manager and head coach.
While the media expressed shock, much of the media used this murder as a reason to make a pathetic political statement about gun control. During Sunday night football, Bob Costas went on a highly-televised rant. He quoted a sportswriter – another man – who also blamed guns. The implication was that if only people couldn't get guns, this woman and the “wonderful” football player would still be alive.
When the media men weren’t talking about gun control, they talked about head trauma and the need for better helmets. Cheez, if so many sports players can afford a gun and a lavish lifestyle, why can’t those million dollar players spring for their own “safer” helmets?
On one Sunday morning talk shows I was stunned to hear another man talk about overweight being the culprit. He implied that if there weren’t so many three-hundred pound players, the brutal tackles that are part of football wouldn’t cause such head trauma.
Maybe there should be a ban on football too. It encourages hitting and knocking people around. It’s a violent and stupid activity. So maybe it’s football that is at fault. Maybe if there wasn’t football, Kasandra Perkins would still be alive today.
Here’s what wasn’t covered by almost everybody: THE TRUTH. Jovan Belcher killed Kasandra Perkins during an incident of domestic abuse. If Belcher didn't have a gun, and he was that out of control, he would have strangled the woman or beat her to death during his a fit of uncontrollable rage. And he wouldn’t have committed suicide in front of the people who had helped him professionally. Did Belcher think he was performing in a stage show, like taking himself out in the proverbial blaze of glory. Another act of abuse.
Gun control, safer helmets and weight management would not have saved that young woman’s life. A ban on domestic violence might have.
Domestic violence kills. Most of the people it kills are women (85% according to the Bureau of Justice Statistics). The CDC says that 25% of all women are victims of domestic abuse, and those are only the ones who report it.
Domestic Violence is an epidemic in the US and around the world. Some cultures still believe it is a man’s right to abuse and kill a woman if she dishonors him (honor killings).
Why are we talking about gun control? Guns don’t kill, people do. And the people who do are the ones who don’t have the emotional competence to deal with negative emotions. Let’s start a worldwide conversation about that…and do something about it.
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Founded by Annmarie Kelly, the Victorious Woman Project is a female empowerment resource containing articles, classes, books, podcasts and other tools for women over 40.